Hey there, corporate media. It's Dave of the social media, you know, the one your networks are always putting down at the same time as you help yourself to content from it. Did you hear that the Rolling Stones took one of my songs? That's pretty big news, isn't it? And did you hear that over three years of televised comedy came from my initial posts to the social media? Isn't it important to inform the public so they don't think I took it from you and try to lynch me? Now that I wrote all the songs and sketches and now that I built the stage, I have to do your job too? I'd rather be able to write laughs than discuss this ugly topic here. How many years has it been now since I first posted my work? Six? And in all that time, did you make sure the public learned about how Dean wrote Size and about how Noel wrote Fortune and about how Tina wrote her sketches? Did you interview George Carlin to find out how he wrote his work? He has a computer right? And did you interview the famous atheist Richard Dawkins and stump him with a reference to the creep who stole my Coats from the Lost and Found blog? That creep must be sophisticated, eh? Great research. Shall I tell you the only question you've asked me in six years: Have you been having a hard time finding work? If you would have added because the band whose songs you stole are doing great, I would have said What band? What songs? I didn't steal any songs! Maybe that's why you didn't say it. Maybe you were saving it for another 'story' you could use to make money at my expense at some point in the future, like November 2012. Other than that, I hear that I'm a priest! I guess you ladies don't have to worry about sleeping with me then. You're off the hook. And I hear I'm a roadie! Well, you stars don't have to respect me at all then, I guess, right?
Tha-anks!
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