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(The hippie host sits in a meadow as birds tweet serenely in the background.) Hello there. Welcome to Folk Tales. I'm happy today because I saw a ladybug. That means that a woman is in love with me. And by killing it I made her want to sleep with me. To apply this folk wisdom to the improvement of your life, you can become very popular with the ladies just by bringing a can of insecticide with you to a meadow like this. Remember those Beatles videos they shot in open fields? That was no coincidence. Killing animals to compensate for human shortcomings has been going on for thousands of years. Take the ancient tradition of the scapegoat. In ancient times, all of the evil of the community was believed to have been redeemed by slaughtering an innocent lamb. (This is why Jesus is sometimes referred to as the Lamb of God.) And as long as no one turns around and eats the slaughtered lamb, they remain free of evil until the next time they have to slaughter an innocent creature purely for moral reasons. |
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| © 2007, 2013. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Monday, July 8, 2013
Folk Tales: Ladybug Killer
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