I'm Joe Loco of the Locomotives. You probably haven't heard of me outside of my home town because no one is interested in our music on the internet. But we figure that that's just because they haven't heard it enough. We have a lot of experience playing our boring, noisy songs in bars to crowds of our school friends and we think we have what it takes to go all the way. In fact, Saturday Night Live is interested in us.
There's this outsider living here who has now lived here for eighteen years and he doesn't have as many friends as we do but for some reason his songs do well on the internet. He got ripped off pretty bad, but it serves him right because he complains about it so much. We could have helped him by inviting him to play a show with us, but instead we decided to tell everyone that he doesn't know how to play his songs. Then when he showed that he knew how to play his songs, we told them that his songs were weird because we don't know how to play them. You see, songs are not important if you want to make it in this business. What's important is being from the right family and having lots of friends and being in a band.
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